The rules of courtesy in conversation mean. The main features of a well-mannered and polite person. The use of "magic" words in speech

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Politeness is strength? Weakness? Need?

this is the quality of a person for whom respect for people has become the usual norm of behavior and the usual way with others. Politeness -

Polite People Rules

- Whose behavior did you approve of? - Who are you judging? Why? - What would you do in this situation? - What is the rule? polite person imagine? Situation 1. After work, my mother cooked dinner, washed the dishes and went to wash clothes. Dad went to the garden to water the cucumbers. And Petya sat comfortably on the sofa and began to watch his favorite program “In the Animal World”.

a polite person thinks about other people 1 rule:

- Whose behavior did you approve of? - Who are you judging? Why? – What would you do in this situation? - What rule of a polite person can you imagine? Situation 2. Marina was given a large set of felt-tip pens for her birthday. The next day, she proudly showed her gift to the girls at school. “I won’t give them to anyone while they are new,” she told her friends.

be polite to your comrades Rule 2:

1. Whose behavior did you approve of? 2. Who are you judging? Why? 3. What would you do in this situation? 4. What rule of a polite person can you imagine? Situation 3. Kolya, running into the classroom, shouted: - Hello, Gray! - I just hit the fat Svetka with my briefcase. It was funny when she fell into a puddle!

a polite person will not cause trouble to another person 3 rule:

1. Whose behavior did you approve of? 2. Who are you judging? Why? 3. What would you do in this situation? 4. What rule of a polite person can you imagine? Situation 4. Once Vova went to the theater. In the tram, he sat down near the window and looked at the streets with interest. Suddenly, a woman with a small child entered the tram. Vova looked at them and turned back to the window.

a polite person is attentive to people 4 rule:

1. Whose behavior did you approve of? 2. Who are you judging? Why? 3. What would you do in this situation? 4. What rule of a polite person can you imagine? Situation 5. Natasha has many friends in the class. They often meet, walk, play, do homework together. Natasha is never bored with her friends.

You will find a list of them at the bottom of the page.

Courtesy is the ability and willingness to speak and act kindly and courteously in all circumstances. A polite person easily makes friends, succeeds at work, and shows respect for others. Perhaps you already have good manners, but want to learn how to show them to the fullest as you prepare for an upcoming dinner party, work party, or party. Everyday life. You can show courtesy by greeting people properly and showing good manners in words and deeds.

Steps

Greet people politely

Smile when you greet someone. If you are meeting someone or just greeting someone you know, don't forget to smile. Your smile will indicate that you are in a good mood and you are glad to see a person. Smiling is a good basis for developing friendships.

Say hello first. Instead of silently walking past someone you know or ignoring someone you have an appointment with, say hello in a friendly way. Don't wait for the person to say hello first; take the initiative in this.

You can say: “Hello, Andrew. Nice to meet you! My name is Elena, I am a translator.

Avoid gossip. While you may be tempted to speak unflatteringly about people you know, don't. A polite person does not speak badly of others, even if the information he has is true. If others gossip in your presence, change the subject or leave.
Sorry if you made a mistake. Although a polite person tries not to make mistakes while in society, it is still worth remembering that perfect people do not exist. If you did something wrong, sincerely apologize. Do it without delay. Say that you are sorry about what happened and do everything possible to prevent similar behavior in the future.
- For example, if you let your friend down by promising to go to a party with them but broke your promise, you might say, “I'm sorry I let you down. I came home from work tired and really wanted to sleep. However, this does not justify my action. So please excuse me. Let's meet this weekend."

"Ugh, how uncivilized!" - says Freken Bock of the legendary cartoon about the Kid and his charming friend Carlson. And if the “housekeeper” is still a collective and generally ironic image, then in real life to hear in your address (especially - in the address of your child) such an assessment, to put it mildly, is unpleasant.

Yes, you can't please everyone. Yes, personality matters. But knowing the rules of etiquette and mastering them is the same as learning to read: you may not become a book lover, but in some situations this skill can save a life (if a dangerous object says “Do not climb - it will kill you”, for example).

Below are simple truths that are well known to adults, but children need to be explained and demonstrated on personal example Only then will they remember the rules.

What is worth teaching a child so that he feels confident in any situation?

1. Say "thank you" and "please".

2. Say hello and goodbye (with peers and adults).

3. Do not interrupt someone who is speaking (especially older ones). And if you still need to say something important and urgent, then you should start with an apology: “Forgive me for interrupting, but ...”.

4. Ask adults for permission in certain situations.

5. Do not take other people's things without asking.

6. Do not evaluate a person aloud regarding his external data (exceptions are positive assessments, but tact and delicacy must be shown with them).

7. Keep up the conversation when the interlocutor asks: “How are you?”. The child needs to be taught that this question is appropriate to ask friends and family, and that it does not require too detailed an answer. Then, out of politeness, you need to ask how your friend is doing.

8. Knock on closed doors and enter only when answered.

9. Show the basics of telephone etiquette: greet and say goodbye, and when the child himself calls someone, you need to introduce yourself and clarify whether it is convenient for the interlocutor to talk.

10. Open doors for the elderly and let them go ahead. Explain to the boys that they should let girls and women go first.

11. Do not push people with your elbows when entering, for example, public transport.

12. Offer your help when needed.

13. To behave culturally at the table, to learn how to use cutlery correctly.

14. Do not talk with a full mouth, use a napkin while eating.

15. Do not reach across the entire table for food, but ask those who are sitting nearby to pass the dish.

16. Accept any gifts with gratitude.

17. Do not speak rude, swear words.

18. Do not tease or call anyone names.

19. Ask for forgiveness when the situation calls for it.

20. Cover your mouth with your palm when sneezing and coughing, do not blow your nose in public and do not get your fingers up your nose.

The list could be very long, because we learn the rules of behavior all our lives. For some time, a child has enough basic guidelines, after which he will already understand himself: being polite is a good and pleasant thing.

Adults will have to show maximum patience and love in order to "do no harm." After all, politeness implies respect for other people, and this art cannot be learned under pressure. Agree, it looks strange when an adult asks the kid not to swear, but he calls the child stupid (there are also extremely rude evaluative expressions) - and this, unfortunately, is common.

“Do to others as you would like to be treated” is the rule that works when you don’t know how to behave. What is not a motto for young ladies and gentlemen?

How to teach children the rules of politeness?

"A polite person is always safe, but a rude person will be in trouble"

(from the writings of Japanese warriors)

A prerequisite for a normal life in society is the maintenance of optimal relations between its members and the desire to avoid conflicts. This becomes possible only by recognizing the right of each person to attention and respect through the observance of the rules of courtesy.

Unfortunately, in society there is often a manifestation of harshness, rudeness, disrespect for other people. The norms of decent behavior are often neglected, although it is extremely difficult to establish mutually beneficial and harmonious relations in society without courtesy.

The rules of politeness of children must be methodically taught

What is politeness and its meaning?

Politeness is a character trait that belongs to the categories of "morality" and "behavior".

A person endowed with this quality is characterized by:

the ability to communicate tactfully and respectfully with people;
the ability to find compromise solutions in conflict situations;
the art of listening to the opposite point of view.

The concept of "politeness" in different cultures has different meanings. What in some countries is considered strange or rude, in others is considered a manifestation of politeness. This is a kind of tool with which people feel comfortable being in society and in contact with each other.

Children should also hear words of gratitude from adults.

For children, politeness matters only when it becomes the norm of everyday life and has become a habit.

For this to happen, the younger generation needs to be explained what a good tone is. With the help of special exercises, it is necessary to make politeness for children natural.

It is well complemented by delicacy, which is an innate quality, which, unfortunately, cannot be learned, but you can get closer by studying the rules of politeness in children. In addition to parents and teachers, this is successfully facilitated by the teacher's own efforts and inspiring examples.

Good manners are instilled in children in the family.

The criterion by which one can determine how polite a person is can be by the ability not to put people in an awkward position. Being in society, every act and desire inevitably, directly or indirectly, affects others.

Therefore, a boundary must always be established between desires and possibilities. To strengthen it, there is self-esteem and one's own attitude not to cause harm and inconvenience to others.

Where to start?

The first thing a child should learn is the words: "thank you", "please" and "sorry" ("sorry"), and situations when their use is appropriate. For example, the word "thank you" is customary to give thanks, and this word means the one with which we say to a person "God save" for something that he was not at all obliged to do. “Please” means “to give because you love” (from the other Russian “please”), pronouncing this word, we recognize the free will of another. With the word "sorry" or "sorry" we ask for forgiveness.

Magic words should be first in the lexicon of a little person

These words should be used freely, automatically, naturally, otherwise, they sound impolite, with notes of rudeness, disrespect and hostility.

There are no trifles in teaching politeness to children; everything related to relationships requires attention. The rules of courtesy for children include methods of addressing, acquaintances, greetings, acquaintances.

In communication, it is necessary to remember the "inequality" between adults and children present and entering the premises, girls and boys, waiting and late.

Rules of conduct in transport - one of the types of courtesy

The child must understand that the physical defects of people are not a reason for ridicule; you need to address peers and younger by name, to adults - by name and patronymic. It is necessary to draw his attention to the fact that it is almost always inappropriate to express your negative emotions openly and violently. And that the highest indicator of courtesy to others is restraint.

Practical training for children

Practicing courtesy for children starts in the family. The best role models are household members, and first of all, parents, what is instilled in exemplary behavior (worthy of emulation) cannot be instilled by force.

Observing the behavior of the baby, you need to notice his mistakes in the relationship, and later in a calm atmosphere to discuss the situation and explain why he is wrong. It is desirable to give an example of how this should have been done.

Family etiquette rules

In everyday situations, the child needs the words: “thank you” - “please”, “good morning” - “good night”, etc., and make sure that he answers and imitates you.

Education of politeness through games

The game is the most accessible means for the understanding of the child to comprehend the structure of the world, this is the most favorable environment for him to learn the necessary skills.

The situation created in the game imperceptibly and unobtrusively will teach the child better than a thousand words. For example, take a plush toy in your hands and say hello to your child. This is how you teach your child how to say hello. Ask him for something using the word "please", etc.

School courtesy games

Encouragements and remarks

It is very important to encourage the child with praise, especially when he is just beginning to learn the basics of politeness. Mark when he did everything right, so he will be more oriented, that is, he will learn well what behavior is correct.

Before making a remark, find out for what reason he acted impolitely. Perhaps there is an explanation for this. In a conversation, it may turn out that the child was shy or upset. Important to find mutual language with your child to build bridges of trust.

A good means of teaching politeness is to watch cartoons and feature films together, paying attention to the mistakes of the characters or their manifestations of decent behavior. Express your opinion and listen to your child's assessment of the character. Discuss with him the "sharp" moments of the plot.

Parents should explain why it is necessary to be polite

Problems of education of polite behavior skills

It happens that the child gets out of control: he makes a reservation, keeps silent, does not respond to comments, does not hesitate to use profanity. He does not listen to anyone, and changes the usual manner of behavior in the family.

This behavior is typical for teenagers. By his actions, he consciously or unconsciously seeks to prove to others that he is no longer a child. At the same time, he demands respect for himself and the inviolability of his personal space. He regards any intrusion as utter disrespect.

Indifference is one of the manifestations of impoliteness

Experienced teachers believe that such behavior is the result of a lack of attention and indifference on the part of people who are authoritative for him. Hence the rudeness, in response - a conflict, a verbal skirmish. A teenager has a reason to show independence, and he slams the door. Here is a familiar situation for many.

The only way out of this situation is to show respect for the child and recognize him as an “adult”. As a result of a showdown, he must understand that being an adult is a responsibility. For example, tell him: “I will not touch your clothes, but you must make sure that they are in order”; "I won't go into your room, but now you have to mop the floor and dust yourself."

Carefully appeal to the idols of the child, do not speculate on his feelings for this or that celebrity.

Only an unobtrusive mention of the best qualities of his hero is acceptable. Take an interest in the biography of an idol. Surely even the singer who died due to drugs had qualities that are worthy of emulation. It would be good to sort out the negative moments of the life of a star and discuss with the child what was the mistake that led to negative consequences and what he lost in doing so.

If a stranger scolds a child, parents should take the side of their baby

There are situations when an outsider gives an assessment of your child's behavior. In this case, the best option would be to adhere to two principles:

parents are always on the side of their child;
restraint, which means not getting involved in a conflict and not exacerbating relations with a third party.

What to do with children's spontaneity?

It must be known that it comes from a lack of self-consciousness. After any manifestation, such as pointing a finger at someone and discussing loudly appearance a stranger, a story about household chores at a party, you need to talk with the child and discuss the situation.

Ask him to imagine that he, too, may be in an uncomfortable situation.

For example, a mother will tell about his secrets with the same spontaneity, or he will be ridiculed among authoritative people for no reason. Ask how he would feel in a similar situation.

Rules of courtesy for children

It is always a pleasure to communicate with a well-mannered, cultured, educated, polite person! A lot depends on our ability to behave in relation to other people in life, and often we do not understand or underestimate this. Circle of friends and acquaintances, reputation in the team, success in business, harmony in personal life- well-being in any of these areas, you see, largely depends on how we communicate and behave with other people.

Being polite is actually not always easy. Many of our entourage or even outsiders do not really like us or frankly do not sympathize, often troubles in personal life, fatigue, and stress interfere with restraint and adequate behavior. But one of the most important qualities of a successful modern man is self-control and politeness. That is why it is so important that our children learn this from an early age. A polite child will always be preferred to a rude and boorish one, even and especially when he grows up. And you need to strike while the iron is hot, that is, it is necessary to teach children the rules of politeness from an early age.

Rules of polite behavior and communication for children

The most universal, perhaps, the rule can be known to all: do to others the way you want others to do to you. But children do not always consciously want to be greeted or paid the slightest attention to them. However, without this in the formation of politeness is indispensable.

Perhaps, it should start from the fact that explain to the child what politeness is, what polite children are and why it is better and even very important to be polite. Then gradually move on to practice and begin to apply the acquired knowledge in everyday life. A very convenient help for parents are the rules of politeness for children in pictures, the rules of politeness for children in verse and many other publications, which today will not be difficult to find and buy.

It is hardly possible to clearly and point by point state all the rules of polite behavior, because in almost every life situation or a small episode you can behave in a certain way. But the starting point can be the study, understanding and application of the so-called magic words, the words of politeness: “hello”, “goodbye”, “thank you”, “thank you”, “sorry”, “permission”, “please”, “be kind " etc. But they can be used in completely different situations. For example, apologies are asked not only when they act badly, wrongly, cause someone inconvenience or feel guilty about themselves. The word "sorry" can be both a request (for example, when trying to move forward in a large crowd of people or a desire to ask something), and a way to get attention (for example, by joining other people's conversation).

The use of verbal (that is, verbal) politeness tools will get better as the child's life experience increases: the more he meets and communicates with other children and adults, the more he can practice.

The words of gratitude deserve special attention. You need to thank not only for the gifts or surprises provided, and this should be done even if the present was not to your liking. With words of gratitude, you need to respond to a compliment addressed to you, to a service or help provided. By the way, helping others is also a sign of politeness.

It is possible to be impolite/polite without even using those special words. The kid needs to be explained that it is unacceptable to call names, ridicule or invent nicknames for other people, focus on their shortcomings, express their displeasure or anger aloud. Instead, you should compliment others and express praise, note the merits and good qualities be able to listen and be interested personal affairs others. For example, after answering a question posed to a child, how is he doing, it will be polite to ask his interlocutor about the same.

Even without saying a word (and often children do not want to respond to a greeting or goodbye), you can behave politely or ugly. A sincere smile in response can replace words that are sometimes so difficult to pronounce. The same smile in the appropriate situation can be completely inappropriate and speak of bad parenting.

A polite child should know and understand that others need to be respected (especially adults and even more teachers), that you can’t think only about yourself and your comfort, that interrupting without extreme need or shouting, talking loudly in public places is ugly, just like like picking your nose or biting your nails.

There are many other rules of politeness, among which some more basic ones can be mentioned:

Always say hello first and return the greeting.
Smile, be in a good mood.
Don't interrupt when others are talking.
When you enter a closed door, knock.
When leaving a closed door, hold it with your hand.
When coughing or sneezing, cover your mouth with your hands.
Yawning or hiccupping during a conversation with the interlocutor, you need to apologize.
Ask permission if you're not sure about something.
Use the word "may": may I ask you? let me ask? let me pass?
Don't show that you're not interested.
Don't argue, avoid conflict.
Don't answer rudeness with rudeness.
Remember: a polite person will never intentionally offend another or create trouble for him.

There are many rules of courtesy for children and adults. But a child brought up in a cultured, educated family will feel many of them intuitively, even without special emphasis on them from adults.

How to raise a polite child: rules for parents

Probably, many parents will agree that children learn bad things faster and easier than good ones. It is worth sending the baby to Kindergarten or take a walk in the yard near the “bad” company, as in the culture of behavior and communication of the child there is already something to work on.

Meanwhile, the truth is also that no matter how we raise our children, they will still be like their parents. And this means that raising a child, teaching him polite communication and behavior makes no sense if we ourselves do otherwise. Whether we like it or not, whether we notice it or not, children always copy their moms and dads, though not always to the same extent.

So the rules of politeness exist not only and not so much for children, as in the first place - for parents. And the most important, the most important of them is to be the best example for the child! You can repeat to your child a thousand times that arguing and swearing is ugly and unworthy, but once you quarrel with the man who pushed you in the store, the child will take such behavior as a model. Learn to control your thoughts, emotions and actions in any situation and maintain a good tone of behavior, regardless of the situation. And, by the way, it is necessary to start with communication with the child: when addressing him, use words of politeness, have the patience to listen to the end and not interrupt, be able to ask for forgiveness and be sincerely grateful.

Trying to instill in your child the rules of good manners, follow the recommendations that will help you achieve your desired goal and not get the opposite result:

From the first days of your communication with the baby, build a warm, family, trusting relationship. Then you will be an authority for the child, he will listen to your instructions, will turn to you for help and advice.
Start teaching courtesy early age: even non-speaking children understand everything perfectly!
Use a game form of learning: role-playing games, reading thematic literature, discussing images or life situations.
Do not impose courtesy rules on children. Do not force them to act or speak in a certain way, do not scold them for "wrong" behavior, and do not shout.
Give a choice to do one way or another, but at the same time explain the advantages of one tactic and the disadvantages and consequences of another.
Explain why you should do this and not otherwise.
Do not proofread, scold, or lecture in front of other people.
Do not be ashamed because of the child's behavior and do not shame him. Focus on what should have been done, criticize the behavior, but in no case the child.
Always take into account the characteristics of the character and temperament of the baby, his mood and well-being. The personality of your child, his experiences should be above the rules established in society.
Praise for politeness and culture. Note how much you enjoy it.

Teaching children politeness should be unobtrusive, harmonious, bring mutual pleasure. In this process, not only the child is improved, but also the adult. Polite people find it easier to find a common language, and this is so important!

Polite rules of conduct

I. Rules of personal hygiene, neatness and tidiness

Get up at the same time every day, ventilate the room and do exercises.

In the morning you need to wash your face, brush your teeth, wash your ears and neck.

Before going to bed, you need to wash yourself, ventilate the room well.

Always wash your hands before eating, after work and after going to the toilet.

Use a handkerchief, make sure that your nose is always clean.

When sneezing and coughing, turn away, covering your mouth with a handkerchief.

Keep your hair in order: it should be neatly trimmed and combed or braided.

You have to learn and always do it yourself: make a beautiful bed, sew on a collar, wash and iron it, sew on buttons, clean shoes.

Be able to set the table, sit at the table correctly, use the appliance, eat culturally.

Always be neat and neatly dressed. Clothing must be clean and ironed.

At school you have to be in a school uniform, at home - change into home clothes, you should dress especially neatly, festively, elegantly on a visit.

Leaving the house, look at yourself in the mirror: is everything all right?

You need to take care of your clothes and shoes, and keep them clean yourself.

Learn to wear your clothes beautifully, let them not squeeze you, be “real and ironed.

Keep your home and school supplies in order.

Maintain order in your work corner: wipe the dust, always conclude books and notebooks in the same place after class.

Any thing that he took, put in its permanent place: scissors, needle, comb, book.

Always hang your coat on your hanger, do not leave it on a chair. Home clothes always lie in their place or hang on hangers on which the uniform hangs.

Keep your toys in order too. Put everything back after the game.

I I . Rules of politeness and culture of speech

Politeness is the attitude towards other people. A polite person does not cause trouble or offense to another.

A polite person always says hello and goodbye. It's impolite not to say hello.

If you are sitting and an adult enters the room, stand up to greet him.

You need to greet an adult first, but you can’t reach out your hand yourself. They shake hands if an adult extends his hand. When greeting, you must look into the face of the person you are greeting.

If an adult speaks to you and you are sitting, stand up and speak while standing.

Be polite to your comrades: do not give them nicknames and nicknames when talking, do not shout, do not forget to say “magic words” (“thank you”, “please”).

In games, don't be rude, don't shout. Do not argue with a friend over trifles, do not quarrel, try to work and play together.

Don't sneak. If a friend is wrong about something, tell him about it right away, stop a friend if he is doing something bad.

A polite person does not respond to rudeness with rudeness.

A polite person is affable and attentive to others. If he is asked about something or asked to do some kind of service (bring something, give something, help someone, etc.), he always does it willingly.

One must be polite in words, in tone, in gestures, in actions. Polite words (“please”, “thank you”, “please”, etc.), spoken in a rough voice, in a cheeky tone, cease to be polite.

III. Rules of conduct at school

It is worth coming to school neatly dressed, in a well-ironed uniform, smoothly combed, in well-polished shoes,

All school things should be in order, neatly packed in a bag.

You have to come to school on time, without being late. When you enter the school, do not push, do not rush to get ahead of everyone, dry your feet well before entering.

The boys at the entrance to the school take off their hats.

When you enter the classroom, say hello first to the teacher, and then to your comrades.

On the lesson. If you are late for class and enter the classroom after the bell, ask the teacher's permission.

If an adult enters the class (teacher, director, father, counselor, etc.), everyone stands together at their desks, greeting those who entered. You can sit down only after the permission of the teacher (director, counselor, etc.).

To properly stand at the desk, you must carefully and very quietly open the lid and rise, calmly lowering your hands.

During the lesson, sitting is assigned directly. Hands lie on the desk, legs on the bar; You can’t look around, look around and talk in class.

If the teacher asks a class question and you want to answer, raise your hand. You have to raise your hand when you want to ask something from the teacher.

When the teacher allows you to answer the question, you need to ask him about something, you need to stand up. Talk to the teacher while standing.

It is necessary to make a request to or teachers, comrades, using polite words: “please”, “thank you”.

Stand straight at the board. Coming to the board, rimming his form.

Take care of your desk, don't break it, don't write anything on it, don't scratch it.

On shift. You can go out to change only after the teacher allows.

After the teacher’s words: “The lesson is over,” everyone lines up in rows and leaves the classroom in turn, without pushing at the door and without trying to go ahead of the teacher.

Only those on duty can stay on changes in the class. They wipe the blackboard, ventilate the rooms and follow the various orders of the teacher. After work, they wash their hands.

In the corridor, you should try to walk on the right side, you can’t run, shout, keep your hands in your pockets, huddle against the wall, start a fight.

During breaks, you can play different games.

You must say hello to all adults and school attendants whom you meet for the first time that day at school.

If an adult (teacher, father, nanny) meets at the door, make way for him. If a girl is walking next to you, let her go ahead.

You need to have breakfast during the shift in or class in the buffet. Children who take breakfast with them stay in the classroom for a big break, spread a napkin on the desk and eat, trying not to crumble on the floor.

Breakfast that is bought at the buffet must be eaten at the buffet.

After breakfast, you need to wipe your hands or with a napkin with a handkerchief so as not to stain your clothes, notebooks and books.

Papers, cores should be thrown into a special basket, a landfill.

In the shift, you need to remember to go to the toilet room so as not to take time off from the lesson. Wash your hands after visiting the toilet.

In library. Books must be returned within the specified time. A library book must be handled with particular care: do not bend corners, do not stain the pages. If you see that the page is not holding well, glue it. When returning a book, be prepared to answer the librarian's questions about the contents of the book.

IV. Away Rules

Thank you if you are invited to visit.

First ask permission from your parents, and then give an answer. If you promised, be sure to come.

It is customary to come to a birthday with gifts. The main thing in a gift is not its value, but attention to the person. A schoolchild can give a neatly made craft, embroidery, etc. If a schoolchild has small savings, he can buy an inexpensive gift for the birthday of his parents, friend, relative.

Be friendly and cheerful when visiting. Keep it simple, don't attract the attention of others, don't laugh too loudly, don't scream or mess around.

If guests come to you, think in advance what games and entertainment you can offer them.

Whatever you do, you must always remember that you do not live alone in the world. You are surrounded by other people, your loved ones, your comrades. You must behave in such a way that it is easy and pleasant for them to live next to you.

This is what true education and true politeness are all about.

A polite person will never turn on the radio or TV at full volume; it can always turn out that behind the wall someone is reading or writing and loud noise will interfere with him.

A polite person would not put a loudspeaker in front of an open window, even on a Sunday morning. What if someone in the house came back from the night shift and is now asleep? Would it be good if you prevent a person from resting?

Even such a seemingly trifle as the habit of slamming a door with all its might or shouting loudly on the stairs speaks of a lack of education. Indeed, in any apartment there may be a sick or hard working person.

A well-mannered person shows respect for other people in everything.

If you see, for example, an artist drawing, do not look over your shoulder at his sketchbook or easel. This way you can stop him.

Do not also look at the book your friend is reading or the letter he is writing. It might be embarrassing for him.

But, if you write something yourself, do not cover what you have written with your hand when someone comes up. Do not distrust the approacher, as if he was going to find out your secrets.

Do not try to read a letter that is not addressed to you. It's the same as eavesdropping on someone else's conversation.

But, if you yourself ask someone to deliver your letter, leave the envelope unsealed, otherwise you will show that you do not fully trust the one who fulfills your request.

Cultivate the habit of constantly remembering those around you:

- do not push through the crowd, helping yourself with your elbows;

- cover your mouth with your hand when you cough or sneeze;

- do not forget to say "please" when you ask for something, and thank you for any, the most insignificant service;

- help an elderly person carry a heavy package home;

- take a blind man or an old woman across the street;

- if the company is playing or sharing something, try to come last;

- even in a conversation or a game, always help the weakest, stand up for him.

Let these actions at first glance not be so significant, but it is from such trifles that the character of a person gradually develops.

And someday this character will manifest itself in a big, serious matter.

Aesthetics of behavior

In fact, aesthetics is the science of beauty. When they say "aesthetics of behavior", they emphasize that the behavior should be beautiful. Not only correct, not only reasonable, but also necessarily beautiful.

It is ugly to stand, transferring the weight of the body to one leg, hunching your shoulders. And etiquette considers such a pose indecent.

Pay attention, guys, we use the words all the time: ugly, funny, tasteless, untidy. This is what the behavior of a person of low culture, bad upbringing looks like. An educated person good relationship expresses to people with beautiful forms of behavior: smartness, composure, attractive manners, dignity, calmness. Briefly speaking, well-mannered person handsome.

That is why good breeding, a culture of behavior make our life together comfortable, pleasant, reasonable and beautiful. We believe in this passionately and sincerely. Then everyone around us: parents, comrades, educators, teachers and even strangers will be fine with us. And we will be well and joyfully among the people. And without this, perhaps, happiness does not exist.

From small to big

Many years ago, in 1912, in Atlantic Ocean happened terrible disaster. The huge passenger ship Titanic, which was on its first flight from Europe to America, collided with a large iceberg in the fog, got a hole in it and began to sink.

- Lower the boats! the captain commanded.

But the boats were not enough. They were only enough for half of the passengers.

- Women and children - to the gangplank, men - put on life belts! came the second command.

The men silently moved away from the side. The ship was slowly sinking into the dark, cold water. One after another, boats with women and children rolled away from the sinking ship. Here the landing in the last boat began.

And suddenly, screaming and howling, a fat man rushed to the gangplank, his face contorted with animal fear. Pushing women aside, pushing away girls who were holding their little brothers by the hand, he thrust wads of money into the sailors and tried to jump into the crowded boat.

There was a soft dry click. It was the captain who fired the pistol.

The coward fell on deck dead. But no one looked back in his direction.

Surrounding the captain's bridge, the men stood calmly...

This incident involuntarily comes to mind when you see how a healthy, strong boy is in a hurry to take a vacant seat in a train car, ahead of a tired woman with a heavy bag or an old man leaning on a stick.

What would he do if it was not a place to sit, but a place in the last boat? Would he have had the courage, pride and nobility to refuse salvation in favor of the weakest?

I am afraid it is not. After all, the big always grows out of the small. As the Chinese say, "The longest journey begins with the first small step."

You are taking your first steps in life. The path you take in your life depends on what these first steps will be.

Mother's smile

The one who from childhood did not know how to be a good son, a tender daughter will never become a great, noble person.

Just think how much you owe your mother!

How many sleepless nights she spent over your bed when you were very small! How many worries she gave you while you grew up! And now, probably, you cost her a lot of work. After all, she is ready to sacrifice everything, just to make you feel good.

Do you always appreciate her love for you?

Remember how many unnecessary worries you cause her when, having gone out late, you do not come home at the promised time! If you could see what anxiety her eyes fill then, how wary she listens to every step on the stairs, you would always try to return on time or be sure to warn her of your being late.

Isn't all her love for you worth that little attention?

You sleep peacefully, and she sits bent over with a needle until late at night and darns your socks and tights, or washes your shirts, or irons your suit.

Don't you want to do something for her too, to answer this concern?

Start small. When walking down the street with her, do not let her carry a heavy bag, but carry her purchases yourself. When she comes home, help her undress, bring slippers. If she drops the scissors, thimble, handkerchief - pick it up and give it.

Try to help her with the housework more often than anything: help sweep the rooms, wipe the dust. Yes, and do not litter yourself in vain, so as not to deliver her unnecessary cleaning.

All this will seem small to you. But you have no idea how great a joy it will be for her any manifestation of attention on your part. How proud she will be that she has such an attentive son, such a caring daughter!

under your protection

Have you noticed that when a man walks down the street next to a woman, he usually keeps to her left? This custom also has its own history.

Even relatively not so long ago, only two or three hundred years ago, men did not leave the house without weapons. Each had a rapier, sword or dagger hanging on his left side. And officials, even before the end of the last century, were required to wear a sword with their uniform.

In order for the weapon dangling while walking not to hit the legs of the companion, the gentleman tried to walk to the left of the lady. Gradually it became a custom.

Now only the military carry weapons, and even then not always. And yet it’s more correct for the boy to go to the left of the girl, because our people disperse to the right, and it’s better to let the oncoming one inadvertently hit you with his shoulder, and not your companion.

Only the military, when they are in uniform, are not subject to this rule today. In order, without delay, to give a military greeting to the oncoming military and not to hurt a companion with their elbow, they must have right hand free. Therefore, they always go not to the left, but to the right.

It is always a pleasure to communicate with a well-mannered, cultured, educated, polite person! A lot depends on our ability to behave in relation to other people in life, and often we do not understand or underestimate this. The circle of friends and acquaintances, reputation in the team, success in business, harmony in personal life - well-being in any of these areas, you see, largely depends on how we communicate and behave with other people.

Being polite is actually not always easy. Many of our entourage or even outsiders do not really like us or frankly do not sympathize, often troubles in personal life, fatigue, and stress interfere with restraint and adequate behavior. But one of the most important qualities of a successful modern person is self-control and politeness. That is why it is so important that our children learn this from an early age. A polite child will always be preferred to a rude and boorish one, even and especially when he grows up. And you need to strike while the iron is hot, that is, it is necessary to teach children the rules of politeness from an early age.

Rules of polite behavior and communication for children

The most universal, perhaps, the rule can be known to all: do to others the way you want others to do to you. But children do not always consciously want to be greeted or paid the slightest attention to them. However, without this in the formation of politeness is indispensable.

It is hardly possible to clearly state all the rules of polite behavior, point by point, because in almost every life situation or small episode you can behave in a certain way. But the starting point can be the study, understanding and application of the so-called magic words, the words of politeness: “hello”, “goodbye”, “thank you”, “thank you”, “sorry”, “permission”, “please”, “be kind " etc. But they can be used in completely different situations. For example, apologies are asked not only when they act badly, wrongly, cause someone inconvenience or feel guilty about themselves. The word "sorry" can be both a request (for example, when trying to move forward in a large crowd of people or a desire to ask something), and a way to get attention (for example, by joining other people's conversation).

The words of gratitude deserve special attention. You need to thank not only for the gifts or surprises provided, and this should be done even if the present was not to your liking. With words of gratitude, you need to respond to a compliment addressed to you, to a service or help provided. By the way, helping others is also a sign of politeness.

It is possible to be impolite/polite without even using those special words. The kid needs to be explained that it is unacceptable to call names, make fun of or invent nicknames for other people, focus on their shortcomings, express your displeasure or anger aloud. Instead, you need to compliment others and express praise, note the merits and good qualities, be able to listen and be interested in the personal affairs of others. For example, after answering a question posed to a child, how is he doing, it will be polite to ask his interlocutor about the same.

There are many other rules of politeness, among which some more basic ones can be mentioned:

Always say hello first and return the greeting.
Smile, be in a good mood.
Don't interrupt when others are talking.
When you enter a closed door, knock.
When leaving a closed door, hold it with your hand.
When coughing or sneezing, cover your mouth with your hands.
Yawning or hiccupping during a conversation with the interlocutor, you need to apologize.
Ask permission if you're not sure about something.
Use the word "may": may I ask you? let me ask? let me pass?
Don't show that you're not interested.
Don't argue, avoid conflict.
Don't answer rudeness with rudeness.
Remember: a polite person will never intentionally offend another or create trouble for him.

There are many rules of courtesy for children and adults. But a child brought up in a cultured, educated family will feel many of them intuitively, even without special emphasis on them from adults.

How to raise a polite child: rules for parents

Probably, many parents will agree that children learn bad things faster and easier than good ones. It is worth sending the baby to kindergarten or taking a walk in the yard near the “bad” company, as in the culture of the child’s behavior and communication there is already something to work on.

Meanwhile, the truth is also that no matter how we raise our children, they will still be like their parents. And this means that raising a child, teaching him polite communication and behavior does not make any sense if we ourselves act differently. Whether we like it or not, whether we notice it or not, children always copy their moms and dads, though not always to the same extent.

So the rules of politeness exist not only and not so much for children, as in the first place - for parents. And the most important, the most important of them is to be the best example for the child!

You can repeat to your child a thousand times that arguing and swearing is ugly and unworthy, but once you quarrel with the man who pushed you in the store, the child will take such behavior as a model. Learn to control your thoughts, emotions and actions in any situation and maintain a good tone of behavior, regardless of the situation. And, by the way, it is necessary to start with communication with the child: when addressing him, use words of politeness, have the patience to listen to the end and not interrupt, be able to ask for forgiveness and be sincerely grateful.

Trying to instill in your child the rules of good manners, follow the recommendations that will help you achieve your desired goal and not get the opposite result:

From the first days of your communication with the baby, build a warm, family, trusting relationship. Then you will be an authority for the child, he will listen to your instructions, will turn to you for help and advice.
Start teaching politeness at an early age: even non-speaking children understand everything perfectly!
Use a game form of learning: role-playing games, reading thematic literature, discussing images or life situations.
Do not impose courtesy rules on children. Do not force them to act or speak in a certain way, do not scold them for "wrong" behavior, and do not shout.
Give a choice to do one way or another, but at the same time explain the advantages of one tactic and the disadvantages and consequences of another.
Explain why you should do this and not otherwise.
Do not proofread, scold, or lecture in front of other people.
Do not be ashamed because of the child's behavior and do not shame him. Focus on what should have been done, criticize the behavior, but in no case the child.
Always take into account the characteristics of the character and temperament of the baby, his mood and well-being. The personality of your child, his experiences should be above the rules established in society.
Praise for politeness and culture. Note how much you enjoy it.