Modern fairy tale about heroes.

The first story.

In a faraway kingdom, in a faraway state, there lived 33 heroes. And they each had 33 cows. They lived, did not grieve, drank milk, but made good for thirty years and three years. Suddenly, one day, out of nowhere, a miracle Yudo with three heads came flying and let's demand the fulfillment of 33 wishes. The brothers-heroes thought, they were sad. Really all 33 misfortunes fell on their heads? They decided to call for help from three bears. Yes, that's the trouble! Mashenka went into the modeling business, everything works abroad. And without a hostess, the clubfoot were afraid to go, but well, Mashenka will return, angry. Then the heroes of three tankmen were called. Three tankers got stuck in the nearest swamp. The tank was dismantled into parts by conversion, but you can’t get far on Zaporozhets. Then the heroes of 3 white horses called. Three white horses: December, January and February hurried to the rescue, but melted along the way: either global warming climate is to blame, or pollution environment. Nothing to do! 33 heroes will have to bow to three Russian knights: Ilya Muromets, Dobrynya Nikitich and Alyosha Popovich. True, they say, Ilya, in Murom, in three pine trees left from the terrible Murom forests, got lost, heard the nightingale-robber in the spring and disappeared. Dobrynya - got bogged down on brewer's yeast, got carried away by "Athanasius" - good beer, but only lazy. And Alyosha - it is known - went to the monastery, now he lives on Mount Athos, high up, you can’t tell, but they won’t let you in without a visa. So our heroes had to bow to the Serpent Gorynych. And what? Help is nowhere to be found.

Tale two.

Alyosha Popovich sits on Mount Athos, day and night doing the Jesus Prayer. It seems that nothing earthly disturbs, does not sway the Russian hero. An, no! Violent winds blew, it smelled of burning from the native side. Alyosha senses: some kind of misfortune has happened. He threw off his cassock, took out a sword-treasurer, yes - let's go, help Mother Russia out of an unknown misfortune ... How much, how little, I drank good beer, "Afanasia" Dobrynushka, but only one fine day the river ended drunk, relaxing. Dobrynya started up, looked around: something is not good on the Russian land. It hurts with the spirit of a foreign, fetid pull. It can be seen again that all sorts of monsters are itching, they want to soil Russia, to slander it in their own way, in a foreign way. I dug out a mace in the corner, pulled on the chain mail - oh, the chain mail is cramped! Yes, there is nothing to do. It is necessary to rescue the native land. And Ilya Muromets suddenly imagined crows instead of nightingale trills. Instantly the treasured path was found. Look - the faithful horse is saddled, stands, beats with a hoof, gnaws at the bit. It's about to break like a bird. Ilya jumped into the saddle, like an arrow shot from a bow, flies to the rescue of his native side. At the roadside stone they met. Again, as of old, three knights of Holy Russia, three heroes, hurried to the aid of a faraway kingdom, a faraway state, where 33 heroes with relatives languish in captivity. Oh, and the battle was! Great battle! About that only the grasses are thick, silky, but the violent winds know. The sun rose three times and again rolled over the horizon. But not in vain, not for life - for death, the truth grappled with falsehood. So this time the Serpent Gorynych was defeated. And the ZZ hero - they are only nicknamed those, and not heroes at all. They do not know their strength, and if they smell strength, then their dashing enemies will never break. Will it ever reach them that there is no need to look for help from anywhere, only faith is needed and then "The enemy will be defeated, victory will be ours." But that would be a completely different story.

The third story.

Time flew by quickly. Soon the deed is done, but the fairy tale does not soon take effect, does not keep up with the hectic time. But only after the battle of that long-standing, noble three heroes with a miracle-yud, the Serpent Gorynych, slowly, slowly, but 33 heroes began to think differently. And then, by the way, the children grew up. And one day they suddenly realized themselves - true heroes. And it was like that. A competition for the title of "Russian hero" was announced to the media. It is clear, they thought about it, everyone wanted to participate, to earn a title for themselves. Yes, but the competition was fake. And the winner, that is, the hero, was designated in advance - from alien merchants, the so-called shuttles. This shuttle scurried back and forth - everyone brought goods from abroad - sold them. Little richer. And not that very much, but in every possible way he loved to show his significance. He even put forward a candidate for the local government somehow. It seemed a little, he decided to assign himself the title of a hero. What is it - all the heroes, but he is not? So he organized all this hype with the competition in order to glorify himself, his dear one, and elevate him to the rank of an epic hero. Yes, the misfire came out. As one stood 33 heroes with their sons. We went out into the open field to measure ourselves with strength. And the field was overgrown with swan and thistle. Heroes raised virgin soil, plowed, sowed, harvested - 33 countries will have enough for three years. The next time, the heroes went to the seashore to measure their strength. Yes, that's bad luck - the sea became shallow, swampy, exhausted. I had to roll up my sleeves again, clean, restore, grow fish fry. Again, it was not up to the competition. For the third time we met at the highest "frontal" place. They look where the temple once stood - a complete desolation - only dilapidated skeletons, overgrown with elderberry and nettle with crows instead of crosses on the domes. Shame and nothing more. This is when the temples were raised from the ruins, the spirit revived, and then the children stood on a par with their fathers. They create a common cause, they take care of Russia. Once on stupid competitions to pay attention began. And so it happened that that merchant alone remained in splendid isolation. It was he who was awarded the title of "hero", unanimously. Only our 33 heroes and their three times 33 sons do not grieve. After all, the main thing is not in the name, but in the essence. But in fact, it turns out that those who were once afraid of the hero’s miracle became the real heroes. And now, together with their sons, they have become a great power. And they are called proudly - Rusichi. That's the whole story. She told, as best she could, the pure truth, since she herself is also from this kind. They not only gave birth to sons, but also daughters, so that there would be someone to pass on this whole fairy tale by inheritance. For children - for edification, for grandchildren - for instruction.

against Kyiv.
Then you! You will go as a duel against Kyiv.
Thank you, Ilya Ivanovich, for your heroic service.
No wonder you spoke. Look!
Good fellows! Voice to voice, hair to hair.

No, Russia-land is not empty!
- To be a beaten dog Kalina near Kiev!
Glory to Ilya Muromets!
Egey, the field is clean, will you give me a duel?
How easy it is for me to wield you, saber east,
so easy to own Ilya Muromets. I will kill him instead of a gadfly!
Come out, evil boaster, to a fair fight, to a scolding!
Yes, you are old to me in fighters, not my couple and no match for me!
You didn’t shoot the falcon, but you’re already pulling!
For such words, I will not pardon the old.
We are not honor-praise to beat the recumbent!
You get up, come on, well done!
Oh, my soul, I did not expect to meet you like this.
Why don't you kill me, old man? I wouldn't have mercy on you.
Stop getting excited, unbroken horse. Can you tell me what your name is?
What kind of father and mother are you?
- I don't have a mother.
I am called the son of Kalin.
- Yes, I'm your own father!

Is he still bragging about reality or fiction?
- This is true, son, the truth is true.
Here is my ring on your hand.
It's like I'm seeing my mother in a dream.
Forgive me, guilty!
Father! I want to serve Kiev with force-truth!
You find your mother first.
She has a mole on her right cheek, and there is no little finger on her left leg.
You hit me, father, do not regret, outwit the cunning Kalin!
Kill everyone in Kyiv to the last! Spare neither old nor small!
You, Dobrynya, will go on the right hand, you, Alyosha, will go on the left hand.
I myself am going in the middle, the mother itself!
Let the prince with his retinue stand on the sidelines so that there is a reserve of strength in Kyiv!
At least loosen your hand, but the filthy one will not be in Kyiv!
Well, Sartak-Murza, jump on, but don't shout!
Wait a minute, Telebuga, I've been ordered to replace you. I angered Kalina, fell into disfavor!
You will not see the hats of the first combatant again in a dream.

Come on keys!
- On the.
Don't be afraid of me, good people. You go all along your edges,
and who else is in power - beat Kalina.
Mother!
Are you my mother?
Will someone tell me about my mother?
She has a mole on her right cheek.
And there is no little finger on the left leg!
My dear mother! Sorry...
I'm not guilty ... don't drive ...
I brought you a bow from the priest to the earth.
My dear son!
Set sail! Give the bastards!
Mound me! Mound!
Jackals are cowardly! I want to see for myself how much power Kyiv has left!
Mound! Mound!
Turzy my, to me! I'll show you where Vladimir is hidden in an ambush!
As backfired, so we will respond!
Release the Gorynych Serpent! Into the smoke! To ashes! To dust Kyiv!

He flew to Kyiv, damn!
- Ride, Sokolnichek, to help your father!

How are you, mother?
- I'll get to my native side.
No matter how much the wolf steals, the horns cannot be avoided!
The same will happen to the Serpent!
Got it! Look, got it!
We are with Vladimir skin

Ilya Muromets rides on a horse across an open field, then his road diverges in three directions and there is a stone in the middle. Slez Ilyusha, went up to the stone, and on the stone it was not only written, but spat and dirty.

It means that Ilya Muromets is riding in an open field, look: a crowd of peasants is coming to meet him, and one of them says:
- Ilya, let's fight with eggs!
Ilya was surprised at such a strange request, but he didn’t show it, grabbed his pood in both hands and went right and left to bludgeon. Ten minutes later, when it was all over and Ilya was about to leave, the same peasant raised his head and, barely moving his broken lips, croaked:
- Christ is risen, Ilyushenka!

Ilya Muromets and Vasilisa the Beautiful are standing talking. Well, Vasilisa says to Ilya:
- Ilyusha, you are so big, mighty, strong, but can you uproot a birch tree for me?
- Ilya, yes, it’s easy, he came up and pulled out a birch.
- Vasilisa sticks further, but that hundred-year-old oak tree in two girths is weak?
- Well, Ilya had nowhere to go, tensed up, pulled out an oak tree with a root.
- Vasilisa. What about pine?
- But if you sleep, I generally pull out half the forest.

Who are you?
- I am the Nightingale the Robber!
- Ha, and I'm the Bogatyr Razbabnik!
- Something you, Ilya Muromets, start with jokes today ... Did you watch the Comedy Club again yesterday?

Forest. Narrow road. Rides on his horse D'Artagnan. To meet him, Ilya Muromets on horseback.
D'artagnan:
- Monsieur, I am a subject of great France, you are obliged to let me through!
- Go away, fool.
- Sir, I am a great musketeer, you must make way for me.
- Go away, fool, I'm in a hurry!
- Monsieur, if you do not give way to me, I will be forced to challenge you to a duel and kill you!
They go behind the bushes. After 5 minutes, Ilya Muromets comes out from behind the bushes, wipes his sword and says:
- Hooliganism, I almost gouged out my eyes with a wire ...

Ilya Muromets stopped at a roadside stone at a fork in the road, and on it is written: "If you go straight, you will lose your head, if you go to the right, they will take the bride away, if you go to the left, the robbers will rob you."
Ilya scratched his turnip and said:
- And I'll go on horseback!
This is how the first chess player appeared in Russia.

Somehow the heroes gathered at the arrow - Alyosha Popovich and Dobrynya Nikitich. They are waiting for their friend - Ilyusha of Muromets. And if he doesn't, he's late. So they arrived on the field, where they have to fight with the Tatars, but Ilya is still not there. Already they persuade the infidels to wait. They wait an hour, two, three, but Ilya is still not there. Well, we decided to figure it out ourselves. Beaten. Everyone was removed. They rest in their own blood. Then Ilyusha Muromets appears on his heroic horse - even more so in blood, the mace is broken, the helmet is pierced. Friends ask him:
What happened, why didn't you come to the rescue?
- Damn, guys - mixed up the field.

Ilya Muromets came out to the Russian-Chinese border and shouted:
A thousand Chinese gathered, they went over the mountain ... Fifteen minutes later, Ilya comes out again and shouts:
- A thousand Chinese, let's go fight!
Again, a thousand Chinese gathered, again went over the mountain, fifteen minutes later Ilya again shouts:
- A thousand Chinese, let's go fight!
A third thousand narrow-eyed people gathered. Then an unfinished Chinese crawls out from behind the mountain and shouts:
- Do not believe! There are two of them!

For thirty years and three years, Ilya Muromets lay on the stove. And a man came to him. And he looked at Ilya and said: "Fit without restrictions."

Ilya Muromets left in a pure field. A tall oak stands in the middle of the field. The nightingale the robber sits on the oak tree and whistles with all his might. Ilya drove up to the oak and said:
- What whistled, filthy Herod?
And the Nightingale answers him in a plaintive voice:
- Get me out of here, please!

Ilya Muromets is riding along the road, a stone is at the fork: “If you go to the right, you will lose your horse. If you go to the left, you will lay down your head. Ilya was surprised how many fairy tales I drive, I have not seen this, I need to check. I went. In the clearing stands a hut on a chicken scabbard with Baba Yaga. She fed and watered Ilya Muromets, took a steam bath in a bathhouse and puts her to bed:
- With whom will you lie down, Ilyusha, with me, with your daughter, or will you lie down in the hayloft?
Ilya thought that the grandmother was two hundred years old, the daughter is a little younger, no? I'd rather lie down in the hayloft. In the morning I woke up, did exercises, sees a beauty standing near the well, just fabulous:
- Girl, who are you?
- Baba Yaga's daughter, and who are you?
- And I ... m * duck!

Near the old city of Murom, among dense forests and swamps and impenetrable swamps, lived in the rich village of Karacharovo, a serviceable peasant Ivan Timofeevich with his wife Evfrosinya Yakovlevna.

In their old age, the Lord God had already sent them a son, whom they named Elijah. Ilyusha would have been taken by everyone: he was both healthy and strong, and he went out with reason - one grief: he did not control his arms or legs, he sat in bed for thirty years.

One day Ilya sits in a hut all alone; it was summer, suffering; everyone went to work in the outfield; Ilya sits, thinks about his bitter fate and hears, two kalik passers-by approach under the windows of his hut. Kaliki are knocking on the window:

Open the door for us, Ilya Muromets, let passers-by into your house to rest along the way.

Ilya answers:

I, God's people, cannot move from my place, open the gate: I have been sitting here for thirty years now; I don't have hands or feet.

But the Kaliki repeat their request for the second and third time. Ilya stirred on the stove: what a marvel! Feels like he can get up; frisky little legs hold him, he owns his hands. Ilya jumped up quickly from the stove, opens the gates to the Kaliks, leads them into the house.

Kaliki say to him:

Bring us a drink!

Kind people, - Ilya answers, - because I am without arms, without legs!

Go, go, Ilya Ivanovich! Don't deceive us!

Ilya went to the cellar; he poured a cup of green wine into a bucket and a half, brings kaliks. Kaliki gave Ilya to drink that wine, they ask Ilya:

Do you feel strong in yourself?

If there was a pillar from the earth to the sky, and in the pillar there was a golden ring, - says Ilya, - I would take this ring, I would turn the whole earth over at once.

Kaliki looked at each other:

Well, Ilya, bring us another bowl of brew.

Ilya went to the cellar; he walks, grabs an oak tree on the road - he will uproot the oak tree from the ground, his legs will get stuck in the ground up to his knees. He brought mash; gave him another drink of Kaliki.

How much now, Ilya, do you feel strength in yourself?

God's people, now I have a half-silushka in me!

Enough with you and this silushka, - say the Kaliki, - you, Ilya, will be a great hero and death is not written for you in battle; you can safely go into battle with any hero, do not fight only with Svyatogor the hero - the earth itself carries him through force, do not fight with the great Samson - the angels of God guard him, do not start a fight with the family of Mikula Selyaninovich - he is loved by mother earth damp; do not touch Volga Svyatoslavich - this one, if he does not take it by force, will overcome you with cunning-wisdom.

Listen again, how to get yourself a heroic horse: go to an open field, buy the first colt you meet, put him in your stable for three months, fatten him with beloyarovaya wheat. After three months, take the horse through the garden at three in the morning, roll it out in three morning dews, bring it to a high tyn; how the high horse learns to jump on both sides - ride it wherever you want.

Then the Kaliki said goodbye to Ilya and disappeared from sight. Ilya fell asleep after their departure with a sound heroic sleep; slept no less than twelve whole days.

Ilyeva's parents and sisters came home from work, they saw that Ilya controlled his arms and legs, they were amazed, they could not believe their eyes, they were crying with joy.

Ilya asks his parents:

My dear parents, where did you work as peasant work?

We worked, Ilyusha, a meadow-sap three miles from home.

Take me to that harvest, show me my work!

Ilya began to clear the forest; he uprooted old trees, felled them, broke strong oaks, plowed a great field, blocked a fast river with roots; so much one worked in three hours, how much father, mother and workers did not do in three days.

Meanwhile, Ilya bought himself a stallion from a peasant passerby, as the Kaliki advised him, gave him an unheard-of price, five hundred rubles and a half, fed him, raised him, rolled him out in dew; the stallion became a marvelous horse, Ilya's true friend and comrade.

Ilya went to his parent to ask for blessings on the path-road, on great deeds.

It’s not thunder that rumbles, it’s not knocking that Ilya is talking to his father; not a damp oak bends to the ground, not its leaves are spread - then Ilya bows to his father to the earth, asks for blessings:

You are my dear father! Give me your blessing to go to the glorious capital city of Kiev, to bow to the miracle workers of Kiev, to serve Vladimir the sun faithfully, to stand up for the Christian faith.

The old peasant, Ivan Timofeevich, answers:

Ride with God; for good deeds I give you my parental blessing; only for bad deeds you don’t have my blessing; do not shed Christian blood in vain, do not harm even a Tatar, intercede for the orphans, the poor.

Ilya bowed to his father and mother to the ground, went to equip himself on the road: he forged three mighty arrows from three iron strips; Ilya began to look for a sword for himself - only there was no sword for him: Ilya would take the sword by the hilt, then the hilt would remain in his hand. Then Ilya forged a damask spear for himself, saddled a good horse; He put felts on felts, sweatshirts on sweatshirts, put on top of everything a Cherkasy saddle with twelve silk girths, and the thirteenth was the strongest of all, forged from iron.

paceka_pavlova What did Ilya Muromets drink before he got up from the stove on which he sat for 33 years?

We all read or listened to Russian folk tales. I remember as a child I just adored them! Today I want to remind you of Bylina about Ilya Muromets! Namely, about the healing of Ilya Muromets.

How it was? For thirty-three years he sat and could not move his arm or leg. And once his parents went away on business, and he was left at home alone, wandering wanderers came under the windows - Kaliki. They ask him to open the door, but he says that he cannot. But they do not let up and insistently ask to let them in. Ilya somehow opened the door for them, let them into the house, and they poured him a drink, what do you think?

Charu honey drink! I don’t know if it was kvass, mead or just honey water. But as soon as Ilya drank it, his heart warmed up, and he felt strength in himself! And the wanderers said that from now on he would be a great hero and would fight strong opponents and defeat everyone!

So this is what the heroic silushka turns out to be!) The guy was sitting on the stove for thirty-three years, and then he once drank a honey drink and became a great war! Reminds me of the story of Asterix and Abelix and their magic potion! Or maybe it also contains honey?

Let's see if honey can give strength? Firstly, honey is absorbed by the human body by 100%! Honey contains ready-made carbohydrates that do not need to be digested by the intestines, but they are immediately absorbed and supply the body with energy! But besides this, honey also normalizes metabolism, stabilizes the work of the cardiovascular system, and also normalizes nervous system! In addition, honey improves the functioning of the intestines and liver! Those. all this in combination affects the body and not only relieves fatigue and restores energy reserves, but also heals! In middle age, honey helps prevent many age-related diseases. And the fact that honey is very useful in old age is evidenced by statistical indicators that the majority of Russians who have lived for more than 100 years are beekeepers! And this is written in the book of a German author!

Since this amazing product was already mentioned in Russian epics, it means that in ancient Russia he was greatly appreciated and known about useful properties honey!

For example, to relieve fatigue, it is enough to eat 1 teaspoon of honey in the morning and evening, and with severe fatigue, up to 4 teaspoons per day. It's all for medicinal purposes! Very economical, don't you agree?

Eat honey and stock up on health!

What is the strength of Ilya Muromets? Strength in honey! That's what I think he would say!